Welcome to your new life as an emerging socialist nation. Should you every need assistance paying your bills, finding relief from catastrophic conditions, knowing how to feel about politics or religion, or simply knowing where you are at any moment of the day... just ask your friendly Federal government.
Sincerely,
Big Brother
P.S.: Individual response time may vary and we guarantee no actual success as a result of this transition.
When state wide disasters occur and the first response is to look at the federal government instead of their own state government, that is a sure fire way to tell that things are not going right. I need to start a business and as soon as it starts to fail, petition the government to help me out!
I like Ron Paul's response to the question about hurricane Gustov coming towards his home town of Galveston, "I like the idea of personal responsibility." But Ron Paul is way out there... We don't need him in any US office, that'd be silly.
A warning to anyone contemplating their own fireworks show:
-Do Not listen to the man in the portable fireworks stand when tells you all of his fireworks are "totally safe"
-Do NOT use the "BAD MOON RISING" fireworks finale
(the one with a cartoon of cowboy lighting a rocket with a
muslim looking man strapped to it)
-Do NOT stand with your head over the mortar when lighting the BAD MOON RISING
I learned a lot this weekend and it only cost me most of the hearing in my right ear and and all of my dignity.... you have never lived until you see the burning white light of freedom shooting straight at your face!
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(Don't worry Kacey, My hearing loss was only temporary an no one was hurt)
OH EVAN!!! Tell me you weren't on of those crash dummies they showed on the news with his head blown off because of exploding fireworks! That is so scary.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good Times Man! Good times. That is sooooo funny. I hope that you didn't really damage your hearing though.
didn't you realize that the reason they have such long fuses on the mortars was so you have ample time to run away? ;) yeah, so me and my cousin were shooting fireworks off a couple years ago on some uneven ground and the mortar sort of fell over and aimed straight at the house...after we had already lit it. yeah, we almost blew up the front porch.
Yes, Mary Poppins! I've heard great things and our seats are on the fourth row!
We'll only be actually in the city for 4 days, so we're only seeing one show. We tried to see if we could squeeze in another with all of the other stuff we're doing, but I don't think it'll work.
Jenny was a little down today so I told her we could do anything she wanted. I foolishly made this statement in Target.
In an amazing display of selflessness Jenny told me that what she wanted more than anything was for me to get some decent clothes. (I thought my clothes were fine but my wife sweetly informed me that I was starting to look like a hobo)
Somewhere in the flurry of shirts and shorts thrown at me I realized that I was nothing more than a life sized doll and Jenny was playing dress up.
Makes me wonder if there is a market for a chubby lawyer ken-doll...
That is funny. A life sized Ken doll? She must of got you from Dollar General where they sell the knock of Kin doll... guess it's all relative... (Yes! I'll be here all week)
don't feel bad, i call joey my hobo husband, which is partly my fault, cuz i usually need to cut his hair, but when we go out and he has three days worth of stubble on his face, that's all him.
Last night I came across a video of people popping popcorn with their cellphones.
I really want this video to be real. (probably because if it is real I could make fresh popcorn anytime i want)
I have been told that it is probably just a heated table or CGI but thats like telling a kid that santa cant possibly visit all the houses in the world in one night. I believe in you cellphone popcorn
Here is the link if you want to watch it:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=lg_dyD0Nsjw
Hello, Evan. I just noticed your blog through Matt's blog. I spent a night with your grandparents in Leesburg this weekend! They treated my mother and me royally, and we we had an absolutely wonderful time. You come from good stock! Warm wishes to you and Jenny.
As a huge fan of the series...yes it was disappointing that he tried to mix the Star Wars saga into it, but if you sit back and look at it as a fun, action/adventure movie...with a little sci-fi, then it wasn't bad. I would still like to know what the crap he was thinking though!
I haven't seen it, but until I read this post and the comments, I had only heard "it was great!" Looks like the "it was awful" folks have found a home here!
