I
can't
believe
this is happening
to me. What
did I
ever
do
to deserve
such a person
in my life? How
beautiful a gift
to receive when
you know you
have done
nothing
for it.
To be able
to enjoy some
other person's
presence in
your life
is such
a wonder to
behold. So
strange
the
thought
that I never
knew what this
type of comfort
could be like.
It seems that
blessings
come in
all
shapes
and sizes.
At times when
you least expect
them. In ways that
only He could have predicted.
How strange that this
very thing could
happen to me.
Just a girl.
A random
girl.
He is patient
and kind, not envious.
Does not boast.
Is not proud.
Is not rude.
He is not
even self seeking.
And is not easily anger.
He keeps no record of wrongs.
So strange that such a person,
could not know what I know,
but could still love like
that. Amazing to me.
Simply amazing.
Lives and
loves
with the
love of One,
he still has yet
to know. But he's
searching. And i'm
waiting. Learning to be
more patient. And kind. Not
envious. Not a boaster. And not
proud. Not dishonoring others, and
certainly not self seeking. And
most of all, I'm trying not to
be easily angered. People say
you shouldn't believe in
fairytales. I say, if
you believe enough,
The Prince can
send you a
prince of
your very
own.

Do you ever feel like you have something inside you... and you aren't quite sure what it is, but if you don't get it out... you might just explode?

Okay, that's a little melodramatic... but how can you write and not be? It makes it interesting...

I have this slight urge to have a... three hour heart to heart with someone. I have so much on my mind and heart of all natures that I think I might just bust. I'd talk to myself, but I already know it all and quite frankly... re-living it for the oh, tenth time gets boring.

It's strange to think that we as humans are given a puzzle. And somehow, along the way we uncover pieces that we've never seen before. There they are just staring us in the face. Things that seem so obvious but are never quite apparent until the right time. Maybe it's how God works to show us things we need to know, or maybe it's just by chance that we stumbled on it at that time and God knew it would happen but didn't do much to change it. Either way, I'm not exactly knowledgable on the subject... I just know it happens and it amazes me. Some things are so deep and others so elementary... but all of the pieces have a specific time for unveiling.

It blows my mind. You're 100 pieces of a human puzzle and just when you think you get to 99, bam! Here you are an 67 again. Or 42 or 75... I dunno. I just know... life is crazy sometimes...

The things you think you regret, you can let go with the old man... then you dig them back up when the new man needs an explanation for how to overcome an obstacle... and not make the same mistake twice.

God's love is insane to our minds. It's so hard to perceive something like that. It's beyond any beauty that we could describe. How do you explain? How you do describe? It's something we sing... but I can't experience that as hard in the pew as a can when I pray in my bed at night. When I think of all of the things I've done wrong and how He forgave me before I even did. How people that i've expected to be there, who I thought I deserved to have there... weren't. But the God of the universe, the creator, the most powerful being ever... was and is always there. He blows my mind!!! ...In a great way.

And then He perfects every part of me... for His names' sake. He creates in me something... astounding. Who am I that He should have even looked at me? But who am I now that He's been working with me? I don't even know the old me. That person is an enemy... but also a stranger. I make mistakes, but I'm not a living mistake. Everything I have and am is good and better with Him. In flesh, I disappoint myself... but in Him... I amaze myself.

Ladies and Gentlemen, living proof of God's existence and His work in someone's everyday life. Name something stupid that a teenager or child could do and welcome to my old man. Name something God could do for someone and welcome to the possibilities set before my new man.

"I will love you LORD always, not just for the things you've done for me. I will praise you all my days, not just for the change you made in me. But I praise you for you are holy LORD. And I lift my hands, but you are worthy of so much more..." -Life of praise, Casting Crowns.

The Merriam- Webster definition:

1: of or relating to fixed, permanent, or immovable things (as lands or tenements)
2 a: not artificial, fraudulent, or illusory : genuine ; also : being precisely what the name implies b (1): occurring or existing in actuality (2): of or relating to practical or everyday concerns or activities (3): existing as a physical entity and having properties that deviate from an ideal, law, or standard — compare ideal 3b c: having objective independent existence d: fundamental, essential e (1): belonging to or having elements or components that belong to the set of real numbers (2): concerned with or containing real numbers (3): real-valued f: measured by purchasing power g: complete, utter 3of a particle : capable of being detected — compare virtual 3

The Amy Garcia definition:

God, and all things pertaining and related to.


Once again, I have deceived myself into believing what is not real. But... like the bible says, you can tell someone/ thing by its fruits. At least its over now...

"I was thinking that I might fly today
Just to disprove all the things you say
It doesn't take a talent to be mean
Your words can crush things that are unseen
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
You always tell me that is impossible
To be respected and be a girl
Why's it gotta be so complicated?
Why you gotta tell me if I'm hated?
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
I was thinking that it might do some good
If we robbed the cynics and took all their food
That way what they believe will have taken place
And we can give it to people who have some faith
So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive
And I'd like to stay that way.
I have this theory that if we're told we're bad
Then that's the only idea we'll ever have
But maybe if we are surrounded in beauty
Someday we will become what we see
'Cause anyone can start a conflict
it's harder yet to disregard it
I'd rather see the world from another angle
We are everyday angels
Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way"
-I'm sensitive, by Jewel

I love this song sooo much. As most of you know I am fairly sensitive and this song hits me so deep when I consider how the world tries so hard to taint us. One of my co-workers said something priceless to me this week. She said "Amy, men don't depict who you are." Men as in mankind... as in people. If people don't like your bubbly smile, or your laugh, the way you sing, the way you dance, the way you look... it doesn't matter. Men don't depict your personality. You ask God to make you who He wants you to be, then you can dress yourself up with trimmings. But basically (now i'm taking from a lesson I heard in church) You are the Christian, named so and so, who like or does such and such. Men don't decide for you, you do. No one can change it but you.

There's nothing wrong with being sensitive.

Today at North Boulevard COC we began the Young Men's lectureship.

It's so encouraging to see my brothers in action. Using the talents that God gave them to glorify Him and to encourage and edify others.

What a glorious gift.

Off of what my good friend Dave Scott was saying:

We are insanely blessed and it's so evident in everything we have here in America and in our everyday lives.

I wish I could send a list of blessings to everyone. These are a short list of things you have and that can turn your frown upside down.

So... in a similar fashion to the list I did not so long ago... I'm now listing general blessing that we all have.

1) The love of God
2) Salvation
3) The freedom to attend church unmolested by society and the gvt
4) Freedom in general
5) Love... abundant... endless... unconditional love
6) Family
7) Friends
8) Brothers and sisters in Christ of all ages, genders, races, backgrounds
9) Forgiveness
10) The ability to make enough money to survive
11) Homes
12) Food... in abundance
13) The bible
14) More money than any country in the world
15) Sunrises, sunsets
16) the option of fries with that... or any other with that imaginable
17) places to educate us
18) the ability to be free from most types of fear
19) the internet and every other type of communication'
20) electricity
21) Running water... toilets
22) Music!!!!!
23) The ability to pick what you want to be, how you want to dress... endless options
24) Clothes
25) Not arranged marriages...
26) voting rights
27) rights in general that make women more than property or sex slaves...
28) theme parks
29) grocery stores
30) parks... slides... swings...
31) swimming pools... work out rooms...
32) malls.. movie theaters
33) AIR CONDITIONING!!!!!
34) Art
35) Not having arms/ hands cut off for offenses like stealing
36) transportation
37)

to be continued...