This ...

I'm sick. Not a fever. Not the flu. Not a bug. Sick at heart.

Last week one of the guys at work that grew up in this area (i.e., neighboring Pasadena, Texas) told me the story about Dean Corll. I'd never heard of him, and you probably haven't, either. However, I trust a little online research will leave you as sick as I am now. But, you need to know that there have been - and probably are more - people like him in the world. Our kids, grandkids, etc. NEED to be warned. And, it's not just about Corll. He had two helpers. You know, what are the odds of three people that sick combining their sicko, perverted, and sadistic efforts? But, it happened! Sad. No, SICKENING is a better description.

Okay, moving on to That ...

Got Joyce a new present. Real nice. Shiny. Bright. Yep ... you're right. A girl's best friend. A new washer and dryer. Matching front loaders with pedestals. I know ... I'm just too sentimental. But, she's such a likable person!

Finally, there's the Other ...

Joyce and I rented a cabin for a day in Brenham, Texas. The hot-tub was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo relaxing. It felt sooooooooooooo good on my aching feet ... and back ... and (okay, I think you get the idea)! It was a nice getaway. Very peaceful. If you are local, I highly recommend Scenic Hill. About 6 miles out of Brenham in the country. The bluebonnets are just starting to bloom. They should be out in force within the next few weeks.

Did you know that ...

in Alabama it is illegal
- to drive a car without shoes? [What if the shoes have holes?]
- for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb? [Better check his thumb size before tying the knot!]
- to flick boogers into the wind? [Here's my defense: "But, officer, the wind wasn't blowing when I flicked that booger! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!" (pun intended)]

in Massachusetts it is illegal
- to sing only a portion of the Star Spangled Banner in public? [It ought to be against the law for some people to sing anything in public!]
- for candy to contain more than 1% alcohol? [Passss meee that botttttle ... I mean boxxxxx of chocolattttte!]
- to give alchohol to a hospital patient? [Too bad you're allergic to iodine. We're not allowed to use alchohol wipes. We've caught several patients sucking on the wipes!]
- to dance on Sunday [What?!?!?! Same-sex marriage is allowed, but dancing on Sunday is against the law! Go figure!?!?!?]

in Florida it is illegal
- to fall asleep under a hair dryer? [Do you expect me to sleep ON the hair dryer?]
- for unmarried women to skydive on Sundays? [Believe it or not, State Farm's Insurance's statistics show a significantly higher fatality rate for unmarried women skydivers on Sunday versus married women. (Just kidding, but there should be some silly explanation for such a silly law.)]
- to skateboard in a police station? [The police are taking no chances with those who would flee from justice.]
- to tie an elephant to a parking meter? ["Tie" sounds like something one would do with a rope. Therefore, a chain should be legal, right? After all, you don't tie a chain!]

in New York it is illegal
- to walk with an ice cream cone in your pocket on Sunday? [No problem. An ice cream sandwich will do!]
- for women to walk around wearing body-hugging clothes? [Sounds like a good, moral practice. Can the law be broadened and amended to include men?]
- to throw a ball at someone's head for fun? ["Really, officer, I wasn't joking! I meant to hit him and seriously hurt him!"]
- to jump off a building? [The penalty is death - NO KIDDING!]

in Texas it is illegal
- to milk someone else's cow? ["Sorry, officer, I thought I was milking the udder cow!"]
- to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel? [Don't get a room on the second floor.]
- to have an entire set of the Encyclopedia Britannica, because it contains a formula for homemade beer? [If they catch you milking someone else's cow, that is probable cause for a search warrant to check for the encyclopedias.]
- for criminals to commit their crime without giving 24 hours notice - either verbal or written? [I suggest giving written notice by sending the notification by certified mail and filing the read receipt to avoid prosecution later. And, smile real big when they put you on the "World's Dumbest Criminals" show!]
- for children to have unusual haircuts (e.g, a mohawk or spike)? ["But officer, a spike haircut is not unusual for my son Spike!"]

Did you miss me?

Even know I was gone?

I thought so !!!!! No respect !!!!!

Actually, I didn't leave. Just been really busy with work, being a Christian, life, etc. However, Joyce and I did make a trip to West Virginia and Virginia during the year-end holiday season. Long drive ... but nice to see her parents, and the Gibsons, and the Fields clan. My family, however, is a different story ...

Next oldest brother (R) to me is now in a homeless shelter. Youngest brother (W) has provided a place for R to live and "raised him" for the past 2 & 1/2 years. W finally decided enough was enough. Put R out. Don't blame W one bit. R hit rock bottom after his divorce over 3 years ago. He lost his job right after that. It seems work gave him an ultimatum of going to alcohol rehab, or else ... and R made the wrong choice. Since then, his life has been plagued by various forms of denial. He has every excuse in the world why he can't work and get on with his life. His time has been spent sulking, grumbling, growling, etc. On one hand he acknowledges it is his fault things are like they are, but on the other hand he still likes to play the trump card about continually being a victim of bad circumstances. We have discussed numerous times (actually, I discussed while he was supposed to be listening) about the difference it would make if he started making some kind of effort to get his life back in order. It all seemed to fall upon deaf ears. No change whatsoever. We thought 45 days in the regional jail for not paying child support would awaken him, but he seemed to enjoy it (now figure that one out)! Last March, the judge threatened to send him up for some hard time. Didn't faze him. Not one bit.

Over the holidays when I was in WV, probably prompted by the awareness that W was in the process of having him put out, I was able to take R to Prestera in Charleston and get him scheduled for some evaluations and get him signed up for housing assistance. W took R to the homeless shelter 1 & 1/2 weeks later. Since then, R won't answer his phone (provided by yours truly), so we have not been able to reach him. However, we have been able to find out that he was in the shelter for at least 1 & 1/2 weeks, and he has been to Prestera. The last time I spoke with him (the night before he went to the shelter) he was pretty bitter. Guess he still is. Hopefully, he will now start accepting responsilbilty for himself, his actions (rather, the lack of any), and begin to make some positive steps in the right direction. He has no faith to fall back on, so R has a long road ahead of him. In addition, R has two teenage boys who are deeply affected/impacted by what they have been dealing with for the past 3+ years.

As you might imagine, this has been a heavy burden. Nevertheless, we all have challenges we must face and deal with. They make us stronger if we endure and maintain our focus on serving the Lord.

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On a more positive note, I have lost 10+ pounds since January 1st. Joyce and I both are slimming and trimming down gradually. We are not doing anything drastic or any crazy diets ... just trying to eat more healthy and cutting back on the portions we eat. I think of it more along the lines of a lifestyle change for the long term (versus a fad crash diet). In addition, thanks to Medco and Aetna, I am no longer taking Celebrex. I have taken it for quite a few years for osteoarthritis. At first, I wasn't very happy that Medco (per Aetna's instructions) wouldn't refill my prescription. However, I have found over-the-counter meds that seem to do a better job of controlling the irritation and swelling of the right knee. So, it has turned out okay and saved me some money, which isn't too bad. In addition, another plus is this is one less medication I buy from Medco. I'm more than happy to give Walmart or King Dollar my business instead. Oh yeah ... those of you who know me know I'm made that way. I've also given Aetna a few whacks through our HR department here at work. Money is the bottom line. That's why my prescription wasn't refilled. It costs too much. One of the plant nurses best summed up the sitation: "Oh, I see that Aetna is now practicing medicine." She was as alarmed about this as I am. Guess it could be worse. Instead of an insurance company, think how bad it could get if the U.S. government started practicing medicine. Now that could get real ugly in a hurry. Anyway, that's my 2-cents worth ... and you can keep the change.

Have a good day.

... the Original Hillabilly (Aren't you glad the mold was broken?)

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P.S. Okay, I saw DB for a short time back in December.

And, I also didn't see LT ... not in December, not in January, not in February, and not before. Been awhile.

How's that?

And, in case I have seen you and didn't mention it, or haven't seen you and didn't mention it ... get over it. Life isn't always fair. Remember that old saying: "The squeeky wheel gets the grease." Hmmm. Interesting (light bulb coming on). Is there such a thing as a whiny cry-baby teary-eyed wheel? ROFLOLHB !!!!!!!!! Sorry, now I'm getting all teary eyed from laughing so hard. Okay, Denny. You can stop. You're a big boy, and big boys aren't supposed to cry.

I thought you might enjoy a recent e-mail Derek sent. I know workplace safety doesn't sound like the most interesting of topics, but, as you will note, it does have its moments. Even in the airline industry. It seems UPS has a program where their pilots log their complaints and concerns with the aircraft or its performance. Following the complaint is the "solution" to the problem by those servicing the plane. Never let it be said that airline mechanics don't have a sense of humor. And, just think, these same mechanics might have or will be working on commercial planes. So, with these things in mind, "P" precedes the pilot's concern and "S" is the solution. Here goes ...

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK , except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent...
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And, the best one for last ...
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget.

The following supposedly true stories are from a Homeland Security memo I received. It seems that security/law enforcement has its funny moments. Enjoy.

In Kentucky ...
Two men tried to rob a cash machine by attaching one end of a chain to the bumper of their truck and the other end of the chain to the machine. When the truck bumper was pulled off, the men fled. However, they left the bumper behind. And, the bumper had the license plate still on it. :)

In New York ...
A man stole a woman's purse as she exited a convenience store. After a quick 911 call with a detailed description of the robber, police apprehended a man who fit the description. The officer brought him back to the scene to be identified by the woman. When told to exit the police car for a positive ID, the man replied, "Yes, Officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from." :)

In Washington ...
A man attempted to steal/siphon gas from a parked RV. When police were called to the scene, they found one very sick man lying on the ground. The man confessed to trying to steal gas, but had mistakenly put his siphon hose in the RV's sewage tank. :)

In Michigan ...
A man walked into Burger King at 7:50 a.m., pulled a gun, and demanded money. The clerk said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. So, the wanna-be robber ordered onion rings. "Onion rings aren't available for breakfast," replied the clerk. The frustrated robber then walked out. :)

In South Carolina ...
A man brought a bag of cocaine into a police station and placed it on the counter. It wasn't the quality cocaine he paid for, and wanted the desk sergeant to arrest the man who sold it to him. :)